My goals this week:
Get up at 6:15 every morning for tea and scriptures, AND
get more structure into our days (=happy babies, happy mama).
We have been having some seeeerious discipline problems lately with the smalls (disobedience and whining are the main things, any tricks?) and have decided to try cutting out most processed snacks/unnecessary sugars AND also cutting way back on how much Netflix time they get. Day 1 went unbelievably well.
The other night I had this really strong impression: make them feel loved, make them feel valued, and then your problems will start to disappear. It's true -- when I disappear into my own little world -- my book, blogs, cooking, whatever -- these little ones start kinda wigging out and doing whatever they can to get attention. Including whining and disobeying. And fighting. And breaking rules. And just sort of being monsters.
Book, blog, cooking, art journaling, long phone conversations, whatever, they all have their place. And I do believe that kids need to be used to playing by themselves. It's finding that balance, and the balance is always changing...
Anyway -- I don't have a tidy conclusion for this today. It's all sort of a mess in my head. But I will say that getting up early helps my head feel a little neater. Early morning watercolor sessions with the early riser of the house help, too.
Even though she drank the paint water when my back was turned.
9 comments:
I don't have it all figured out (I never will!) but I've found that remaining calm no matter what happens, lots of hugs, telling them I love them, laughing with them, eye to eye interaction and being in the same room with children (no matter what you're doing) at that age is what they need.
Their needs constantly change with age. Our teenager needs a lot of talking time and she also needs alone time. Our 8-year-old needs one on one time, playing games, throwing a baseball, etc.
Amazing goals A! I had to giggle at the paint water drinking - thank goodness for non-toxic, right? =)
Hi, I'm a lurker (sorry!) I thought I'd recommend a book I'm reading called Easy to Love Difficult to Discipline by Becky Bailey. It follows along the same line of thinking that you described above, make them feel loved. I'm about 1/2 way through and it's really helped us so far!
really good! thanks for the wise words. :)
You are on the right track! Keep it up. Love ya.
Um, I love that she drank the paint water. I just want to say Amen and Amen - I have the same debate with myself all the time. :)
We've got discipline problems over here too. Its mainly embarassing me in public by talking back to me or disrespecting me, and then me trying to calm everyone down before I threaten to break favorite toys or put them up high out of reach.
I get to talking on the phone and the kids do whatever they want. They open all sorts of snacks, get out all the toys and just make a mess.
I would try and get up early, but I'm exhausted and just lay in bed waiting for the strength to get up and do it all over again.
Love the water colors though, we have a little Ikea easle and a huge paper roll, LOVE it!
Do you have any type of reward system for good behavior/chores? Maybe a little more discipline and responsibility can help with behavior. Something like a ticket system where they get 1 ticket for doing something. It could be a chore like making the bed, or something small like taking a bath, brushing teeth, etc. Or they get a ticket for good behavior. Not getting into trouble while you are on a phone call, cleaning up after themselves. Weekends they could have bigger expectations for bigger amounts of tickets. Then they exchange tickets in for either $ or go to the movies, store, get a toy, have a pizza slumber party, etc. Giving them something to reward good behavior, not punish bad will help them want to please you more and you aren't handing them anything, they earn it. Just a suggestion! I am a nanny and have seen a lot of different things and want to implement this with my kids one day!
these are some things that I have been thinking about around here lately too! great ideas and goals. I think I will join you on them!
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